What have we done?

It seem to me that the baby boomers have bred imbeciles. Gen X & Y seem to need the minutia of everyday explained to them every day. And if it is not then they will sue someone.

They seem incapable of taking responsibility for their own actions, expect instant gratification and an entitlement to money that they show no interest in earning.

Well the news is that what goes around comes around and they will reap what they sow. Yes, a couple of old adages but they are still in use for a reason.

Compassion, consideration and respect for others is not on their radar because they think I and me and they have none of the above for themselves.

Until the general populace takes responsibility for their actions, big brother will be involved in their every day. If you want big brother to mind his own business then start minding yours!

Good catch?

That is what was suggested to me recently. I have also had other comments along similar lines. You know, do you have a partner? Why not? It has made me seriously consider how I should respond to these questions.

I don’t do intimacy, particularly the emotional kind. Some of this comes from my parents example. I could not name Dad’s best friend and while I could name Mum’s, there was no evident sharing of things that I would expect of that type of friendship.

I have had acquaintances that I have shared experiences with, I have even been married and had another 2 year relationship. What I have always found is that these people are not worthy of the trust required to have that emotional intimacy. I had it during my marriage but when things started to go wrong, he would raise these matters as reasons. This has been the enduring memory of all shared intimacy, when things get difficult, they are just thrown in my face. Therefore, why would I volunteer these things at any time?

So, how do you answer these questions without being offensive? No one is worthy? No one is to be trusted?

I see and have had relationships break down where assets are divided. Well, I have worked for and earned all I have and don’t feel inclined to share it in this way again.

Knowing all of this still does not help me to politely answer the question. I will just have to give it more thought.

Censorship

So, everyone is watching the grand final! Or, they are having a party of some kind around it. I enjoy the entertainment they put on but the tv coverage denies us access to that. Why they think those of us who do not go to the game are interested in the minutia of football I do not know. I want to watch the entertainment and have been denied by the broadcaster.

This is not an unusual event. All broadcasters think they can dictate what we see. The internet says this is not so. We will not be censored.

I want all television broadcasters who think they can control what we see, they do not understand this age of communication. If they are not telling me the news I want to hear then I am searching the internet for it.

This is actually a regular event as the broadcasters try to get us to buy into pay TV. I am a great supporter of FREE TV. Because of this I will protect my right to access free information on television and protest the loss of many events to pay TV. Why should I have to pay for access to events that I have paid taxes to support.

If my taxes are not enough to entitle my access then I deny the right of my taxes to pay  for support of these events.

volunteering

I am a little annoyed with my family at present. Not an unusual occurrence for most of us I guess. I am also over Facebook. I do not want to know the trivial thoughts of the next generation so I have unfriended them. This was not the only reason I admit. I asked them to put a post on their walls for me and none of them did. Says to me that none of them care about me while asking me to post things for them. Well, no more. I have deactivated my account and am no longer interested in the trivia of my family’s day-to-day lives.

Over the last fortnight I have had my siblings and spouses to dinner, separately, and my parents for lunch. It is a far better way to keep in touch. One sister-in-law is really a stranger to me and I thought having them to dinner would let me know her a bit more. She doesn’t have a lot to say, neither does Dad. It is okay because now she knows me better. This is the generation I want to connect with.

My life is interesting enough for me. I have become involved in the community through volunteering and joining a club. I am meeting interesting people and getting to do things usually out of the realm of a regular member of the public. I get to go out for dinner 3-4 times a month and with some events coming up that is even a bit more as the planning comes to a head. I love doing the behind the scenes work that brings an event off, while I have no wish to be the face of an event.

Gastroenteritis

There is a gastro bug doing the rounds at the moment. I got a mild dose of it and am unsure if it was the door handle at the library, where some staff have been off sick, or if it was the cafe with the cutlery out for people to help themselves.

It is always a risk going places where people gather but I am usually pretty lucky and avoid the ills. So the last couple of days I have been off my tucker and wishing I always felt this way about food, ie. eat because I am hungry, not because I like food.

Anyway, I made a belated call to a family member today and told her I had been feeling queasy. She said I should have called someone if I was unwell so they could help me out. Who wants to hear from someone saying they are sick? That is one of the things to deal with when being single, you have to ask before anyone cares about you.

What I wanted to talk about was dealing with gastro. I did enjoy my chicken soup and toast for dinner last night and dry crackers with cream cheese spread for lunch though technically cheese should be avoided, all dairy and meats should too. Broth, nice and hot, will soothe the stomach while avoiding those other foods will deprive the virus of sustenance thus leading to a quick recovery. Today I had stir fry veggies with lots of onion and garlic, on toast.

 

obesity

Again obesity is in the headlines, an epidemic. I blame the multi million dollar industries of diet and junk food.

It is not necessary to be on a strict diet to have a healthy weight. “Junk” food is not your enemy. Most of us enjoy a potato chip or a cream cake and there is nothing wrong with that unless…..you eat it all the time.

In this day of instant gratification we all believe we can have what we want when we want it. Well, that doesn’t work. If you want to have your cake and eat it too then you are not going to look like a movie star.

I blame the baby boomers again, the belief that indulgence is good. This era is coming to an end and we are swinging back to a time of frugality. We can no longer afford to indulge ourselves every day. Cut back to once a week and it is ok for now. It will save you money and help control weight at the same time.

If you cut back on what you eat then you can fit into last years wardrobe.

Now I am not in the position of being able to preach on this. I have always been a bit pudgy, been on many diets, had my weight see-saw. I still struggle to keep it down but I know how to do it now and if I decide to lose some weight then I know what to do and it is easy to do.

To start take 1/2 of what is on your plate and put it aside for tomorrow and finish with an apple. Then alcohol is a big one. For effective weight loss this is gone for the duration. Try soda water or mineral water with some lemon juice. It is all about fresh. Fresh fruit, fresh vegetables. NO processed foods, this includes hamburgers, chips, cakes and biscuits. The easy one for me is soft drink or soda. I don’t drink it at any time, I don’t like it so don’t miss it. I would like to be able to tell you how to achieve this but don’t recall other than two things, it is full of petroleum and expensive, both of which I avoid.

You don’t need to look like a movie star but you don’t want to look like a sumo wrestler either. Good health means a healthy weight, healthy heart and a longer life.

Now, go back and look at my recipe tips and start enjoying your food, it is your friend now so you don’t want to abuse it.

Sisters

Last week I was remembering an incident where I found myself caught in the  middle of a disagreement between my mother and her sister. It was during a conversation about sisters where I stated that I have no understanding of how sisters relate or the dynamics of that relationship.

You guessed it, I was the only daughter. I have three brothers so they have the brother thing going on which is different again from the brother/sister thing.

What bothers me about all of this is that I feel like I missed out on something. I know that I am not the only person who has this relationship but that makes no difference to how I feel.

While my parents did there best and believe they did what is right, I was treated differently to my brothers. They were allowed to be boys, join in the fun, go on camps etc. I was not allowed to go on camps, go to after game events, even choose my own friends.

Of all my cousins, only one other has no sister but her brother also has no brother. We saw little of these growing up. The ones I spent time with were sisters, I always felt like an outsider and that really hasn’t changed.  The person I feel closest to these days is my sister in law. You guessed, she too has a sister.

Where has this left me? I was left with no one to talk to. My parents were not of the touchy feely kind, so I am very protective of my personal space.

So, what am I trying to say is that my environment has made me what I am. I am unable to love someone else more than myself. I struggle to think of others first. My first impulse is to please me, do what I want. I don’t like that about me. I am trying to change that by joining a service club and volunteering.

It is not that I am unaware of being better off than so many others, it is not that I don’t know others need help, it is that I am not fitted to do what is required. I have poor social and communication skills so interacting with them would not help them.

This is something I have to live with and I just wish I had a best friend to express this to as she would tell me what assets I do have that I might contribute.

 

Social Responsibility

I have just read an article about being subject to the approval and acceptance of others and how it impacts on our behaviour. The view being presented was that we should only care about our own approval, thus freeing us to behave in any way we like.

My problem I see with this is that it would cause the breakdown of society. It would mean that we no longer follow the law, nor do we care about others rights or feelings. It really seems to be promoting anarchy.

While I have no problem with people having fun, being true to themselves and even being a bit out of the square, there are consequences. Hurting someone else in order to do these things, whether physically or emotionally is not going to make you feel better. In fact, it will likely make you feel worse. Not because you take responsibility for the hurt but because it did not bring you the joy you expected.

If you feel you are behaving in a way that is not true to yourself and this is because of others expectations, the solution is to explain to those persons why that is so and that you will no longer be doing that and intend no disrespect to them. It is then their responsibility for how they feel and you are free of that behaviour.

We all have a responsibility, if we choose to live among people, to behave in a way that fits society expectation. If you wish to live otherwise, find a hut deep in the bush and there do whatever you like.